Roller Coasters

From the time I was a little girl, I loved the thrill of a roller coaster, the ups and downs and twists and turns, screams and squeals of delight and terror. At some point I realized that some of my friends were terrified of the same things that gave me such a thrill. Over the years I've come to realize that there are different types of roller coasters. And some, like the rickety ol' white coaster at Lagoon, are familiar and fine. But there are some I hope to never ride because I'm sure I would NOT like it.

Last week our family was shoved onto one of those nasty-scary coasters. We've experienced the frightened anticipation of knowing what could be coming, and still being TERRIFIED when it does, all the while screaming (both outwardly and inwardly) that we didn't want to ride anymore.

This particular Roller Coaster has a name:

Type 1 Diabetes

On Saturday, Feb 21st we attended the Draper Utah Temple Open House. It was a BEAUTIFUL day! The sun was shining, the sky was blue and it was a warm, pleasant day.

During the trip we noticed (and were annoyed) at Carson's frequent need to urinate & get a drink of water. It was after about the 8th time of needing to go in as many hours (or less) that we became concerned. Upon arriving home we did a little research on http://www.webmd.com/ and became very concerned. We decided to adopt a "wait and see" attitude. After confirming with his teacher Tuesday morning that he was doing the same thing at school, we made an appt. with our Doctor. At 3:30PM on Feb. 24, 2009 we hit our first big SCARY dip on this ride.

A normal blood glucose rate is between 70-120. Carson's official number (after a few blood tests) was 541! Dr. Grose called Primary Childrens Hospital and arranged for us to admit Carson that night. My head began to swirl & scream, my stomach lurched and my heart just pounded out the tears. I'm not one of those "hold it in until your child can't see you" kind of moms. I tried. I honestly tried, but the tears just softly fell. (at least I held in the sobbing and screaming part).

The only experience I've ever had with Type 1 diabetes was when Carson's best friend, Parker, died 2 years ago from this dreaded disease. I didn't want my child to die. I didn't want him to constantly worry about his fate being the same as his sweet friends. I wanted him to eat ice cream and skittles and get invited to birthday parties where cake was served. I wanted him to always enjoy Halloween and trick or treating. *STOMP* I want a different diagnosis....tell me it's a UTI and that he can take an antibiotic for a few days and then be fine. But it didn't come and we still have the same diagnosis & a whole new life.

Upon arriving at Primary Childrens Hospital in SLC we were greeted with warmth and kindness. The staff there is INCREDIBLE! Every single one of them are my new Heros! On a scale from 1-10, my stress level went from a 125 to about a 3 in the matter of minutes. There is a very special spirit there and I felt enveloped by their caring, capable hearts. They had Carson completely relaxed and HAPPY very quickly. He was so excited to be able to go down to the cafeteria at 11PM and choose whatever he wanted to eat. What an adventure.

The next few days are a blur. We stayed right in Carson's room. Darren slept in an upright/non-reclining rocking chair & I slept on a fold-out chair that I nicknamed "The Ironing Board". People came in and people came out. Everytime we redefined "the new normal". We learned out to count carbs and divide by Carson's "magic number". We learned all about the 2 different kinds of insulin that Carson is now taking (FOR LIFE!), how to figure out the dosage & how to draw them up from vial to syringe and then give him injections (a MINIMUM of 4x a day!). Darren & I even got to give an injection to each other. By day 2 Carson was independantly checking his own BG (Blood Glucose) levels and calculating & giving his own Insulin Injections! HE'S A ROCKSTAR!!!! And so BRAVE!!!!

We arrived home on Thursday night to a happy sister (thank heavens for cell phones and texting!) and a cleaner house (THANK YOU Kelly!) and supportive and wonderful friends! (Too many to name, but BIG shout-out to Tamara, Desi & Kris). He went to school on Monday and while I held my breath and prayed every second that he'd be ok. At the end of the day he came home with a packet full of love, a collection of get-well cards from his classmates who had been so worried.

This is my new life, and while I'm really sad about it, all I have to do is remember the wisdom of a wise old soul who happens to be my favorite little boy. When asked by his daddy (who happens to be my sweetheart) if he was doing ok with all of this, he said,
"Yeah I'm ok Dad, Sometimes Life isn't Easy and it's Ok"

Monday reMINDER

I still have a few spots left on my FRIDAY 5 freebie! So if you want a little giftie from Melz....let me know! ;)

As Promised

As Promised, here are the 2 projects that we made at Stamp Club the other night! (And a shout-out to Theresa....YES! Lets get together next time I'm in Preston! I'd love to stamp with you!)

I'm calling it the Little Box O' Love

and the

"Glitterfied Chunky Love" Card!

First: The Deets on the Glitterfied Chunky Love Card:

Paper: Basic Grey, Pink Passion, Textured Black & Glossy White CS

Inks: Basic Grey, Purely Pomegranate (retired)

Accessories: Chunky Glitter (Silver), Dazzling Diamonds, 2 way Glue Pen, Daubers, Sheer White Ribbon, Silver Cording, Heart to Heart Punch

Stamp Sets: Love You Much, Priceless

And now, the "Little Box o' Love Deets:
(my apologies for the blurry picture, I had the hardest time with this one...Kelly don't shoot me!)
Paper: Pretty in Pink, Chocolate Chip, Glossy White Card Stock
Inks: Red Riding Hood Red, Rose Red (SA Jumbo Cartridge)
Accessories: Red Riding Hood Red 5/8" Striped Grosgrain Ribbon, RHR Taffeta Ribbon, Brad, Dazzling Diamonds, 2 way Glue Pen, Daubers, Crop-a-dile, Scalloped Edge Punch
Stamp Sets: A Happy Heart, Lots of Hearts SA Jumbo Wheel (retired)

Edited to add: Inside is a small cello bag filled with some chocolate candies and then tied with the 1/4" chocolate chip grosgrain ribbon. It's the perfect size for a little gift.\!

Both of these projects are so full of shimmer and sparkle....wish you could see it. We really did have a magnificent time. I hope you can join us sometime!

If you would like to order any of the current products used to make these projects, this would be the perfect time to do so. Stampin Up!'s Sale-A-Bration Sale is in full swing! Contact me for details or go to http://www.melaniefox.stampinup.net/ to order now!

Happy Stampin!

Happy Valentines Day!

HaPpY VaLeNtiNeS DaY!!!



ps Have you signed up and done your 5 gifts blogpost yet? I'd love you send you something! Let me know when you do! And in the meantime....go love your sweet ones!

Friday Five!

A Challenge from one of my favorite bloggers: Sophia Corbridge
1- I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!
2- What I create will be just for you.
3- It'll be done this year. (might be a little while)
4- You have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. It may be poetry or an article on proper procrastination. I may draw or paint something. I may bake you something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you,that's for sure! (From me, it will more than likely a paper creation, because That's what I do best! ha ha)
5- I reserve the right to do something extremely strange. (I would have to add that I reserve the right to take six extra months in getting to the post office to get it mailed. But, you will get it eventually.)

What's The catch? Oh, the catch is that you must repost this on your blog and offer the same prize to the first 5 people who post on your blog. The first 5 people to repost and leave a comment telling me they did win an AWESOME homemade gift by yours truly!

Glitterfied and Giggled

Tonight I will sleep like a happy baby! The reason is because I have been glitterfied and giggled. Yes, I am using the word properly, you just need to be edu-ma-kated! ha ha

Tonight was stamp club night and as usual, we laughed until we snorted, and then we giggled some more. I love watching grown women giggle like teenagers. Tonight there was a wide range of women, ranging from late teens to early sixties, and do you know what I realized? That we all giggle the same.

One thing that I have noticed with this wonderful group of women is their great desire to socialize and include others into this little group. Every month we have someone new come and we hope that they'll be back. Tonight, we had 2 gals that we have missed so very much rejoin our little group! They giggled right along with us as if they'd never left and it was wonderful.

We created some really fun cards that included a lot of glitter....and we became "glitterfied".....poor little Amanda got BATHED in it! I'm not sure what happened, but all at once she was DAZZLING in Dazzling Diamonds!

I love these women and every month I come home with a big ol' grin on my mug and a happier, lighter heart. I'll try and take pictures of our cute little projects tomorrow. Be patient with me, remember that my camera has moved on to greener pastures, so I'll try and get Darren's. You'll love them, I promise!

More Holiness Give Me, More Strength From Within...

I'm thinking and that's usually a scary thing.....but it's late at night and I've just read another blog post and it's stirred up thoughts and feelings deep inside of me.

I think we've all been in that place when we want to stomp up some mythical staircase and pound on that door that opens the secret cloud door that leads to the magical yet ominous pearly gates...have the guard ring us in, toss our hair back, thrust out our defiant chins and march right up to the "man on his high and mighty throne" and shout an edgy threatening shout:"Why Father Why?! Tell me now, tell me EVERYTHING, don't leave anything out!" And in our mind we stand there, arms folded, leaning back on one foot, other foot tapping, eyes a rolling and heart slammed shut!! The truth is, I don't think we really want to hear as much as we want to be heard.

Many years ago (approximately 16 1/2) I was right in the middle of unsuccessful medical treatments which I was hoping would result in a pregnancy. I was frustrated and sad, angry and confused. I tried so hard to be completely supportive and excited when, one by one each and every one of my friends announced their pregnancies. But the final straw was finding out that, instead of having a son or a daughter, I would be gaining a brother or a sister. Oh, how it hurt, it cut to the very core of my heart and I couldn't understand it at all. With each tear that fell, I took one of those defiant stomping step towards that "mean guy up there" that wouldn't answer my prayers the way I wanted. But that didn't work out the way I anticipated either. The journey there took a lot longer than I thought it would. My huffs and puffs began to loose their umph and my puffed out pride began to soften and as I trudged along my brain and my heart began to communicate. And pretty soon my knees buckled into a humbled heap. Nearly 3 years later my answer came in the form of a little girl dressed in blue to match her deep soulful eyes.

I don't know the whole plan, and I don't claim to have all of the answers. But I have learned to trust in Him. That little answer of mine (and the other one that came 4 1/2 years after her!) has grown up to teach me things that I cannot even begin to describe. They are their own people with their own questions. I can tell you that with all of my heart I know that God does hear our prayers, I know he hears our heart, and I know that he does have the answers for us. But I must admit, I don't always pray, I don't always let him into my heart and I don't listen to his answers nearly as often as I ought to. I think the answers scare us a bit. While He sees the whole picture of our possibilities and potential, we tend to look at our current state of weakness and misery. We can't imagine doing anything different or more. We like familiar and the unknown scares us.

Yesterday was the anniversary of something really awful. For 25 years I have sobbed and sobbed. Tonight it hit me. I survived to tell the tale. I have cried and walked and shouted "why did you let that happen?" and I've beat myself to a pulp for the choices and mistakes that I made. Right now, in this moment, I am stepping onto a new path. I honestly believe that in all the bad that happened so long ago, a story was chiseled into the walls of my broken heart. I believe that the lessons I learned are to be shared and as I feel prompted to, I will.

I believe that when we can move past the anger and change our words from "WHY!" to "Help me understand" we get a lot further. Tonight I am asking for my Heavenly Daddys hand to make the leap of faith from the tear stained ledge of fear. And do you know what? I think He already has! In giddy little girl giggles I feel my heart sing "Thanks Pops!" ♥